Late. For a Very Important Date.

I was almost the star of a bad first date.  I say almost because it did end with him asking for a second date.

It all started when I agreed to go on a date that started at 5:30. I knew it was way too ambitious for me to make it to the bar by then.   Long story short, I made it there by 6:00.  In my defense I did send two text messages letting my date know about my situation. 

I got there and he waved me down.  I was a little surprised he recognized me because I was wearing glasses, which I am not wearing in any of my online photos.  Side note: he loved them.  He told me at least three times that he really, really liked my glasses.  A short while later, he covered his face with his hands, giggled, and then said “you are so pretty, I can’t believe it.”  I appreciated the sentiment, but really, what is a good response to that?  No really, I want to know what someone should say to that.  “Thank you” sounds like a bad humble brag and dismissive. 

We had quite a bit to talk about.  My date had an interesting backstory with how he grew up and was good at asking questions about my hobbies (I hate that question, it makes me feel like I am on a job interview.  I do however, have quite a few hobbies that I can talk about).  We covered the other typical first date conversation starters.  That part of the date was fine.  It was the delivery I had a problem with.   My date was a loud talker.  I have spent my adult life spying on first dates.  The last thing I want is to be spied on by the couple and their in-laws at the table next to us. I think that by the age of 34, you know if you are a loud talker.  If you are identified as one, please try to adjust your volume while on a date.  In his defense, he might have been a little lonely during those thirty minutes that he was waiting for me and found company at the bottom of his beer glass. 

The main point of me highlighting the fact that I was late for the date was to tell you the life lesson I learned because of my tardiness.  When you are late, you lose all control of the date.  There is nothing you can say when your date wants to order food or a third (fourth?) drink.  You cannot say that you have an eyebrow wax scheduled in ninety minutes.  Because you were late and you are only allowed one rude gesture per date.  That is a new rule I just made up.

My takeaway?  Do not be late.  Do not schedule a second activity on the evening of a date.  Do not let yourself think about all the other people who are listening to your conversations . 

My advice for him: lower the volume. 

It was not my last first date.  It was not the worst first date.  I do not think it will lead to bowling.  He did mention something about a comedy club though.