I got a question from a reader the other day:
I went on a date where I have no
desire to see him again. He text me later that night and said he wanted to get
to know me better and I text back that I honestly didn't feel a spark, and he
replied "thanks for your honesty but I usually like to give it 2 dates
because people are nervous on the first date". How do you let people down
gently but honestly?
The guy in this situation has a point, people are usually nervous on the
first date. If you cannot get over your
nerves in the first twenty minutes, it is likely that you are shooting way out
of your league. You have to earn the
follow up, just as you would in an audition, job interview, or sales
pitch.
I am just imagining the nerves the man would have on the second date,
knowing that you did not feel the spark on the first date! If you have another two hours to waste and
you are feeling generous, go for it.
If you do not have the time or the inclination, here is what I would
suggest. Text him back and say “Thanks
for the suggestion. I hope my honesty
saves us both some time. It was very
nice to meet you and good luck on your future dates!”
Please, always respond to people who follow up after a date. Its good karma.
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