Interview with a Gentleman

Next in my series of interviews is a good friend who lives on the East Coast. He is 28, a middle child, owns his own place, wears great jeans, is the star player of a championship intramural basketball team, and has a strong dislike for PDA.

1.What are you judging on the first date?

Men judge...everything. The man should pick the first date location and as soon as they get together everyone is being judged, man & woman. Most important would be conversation topics; is she interesting? If she's not interesting, it'll quickly either become a short term engagement (sex), or, quickly wrap up. One slip up can ruin everything, so don't let the guard down.

2. What is your follow up procedure after a first date?

Depends on how the date went. A real good date is always great to follow-up with a "had a really great time tonight; hope to see you again soon" text. (At this point texting is ok, prior to first date texting is off-limits unless the woman initiates it). The days of playing games are over - so waiting a few days to call the girl is passé' -what are you waiting for? If you liked her and want to hang out again; why wait? Unless you're playing games and just want to hook up.

3. What do you really think about a girl who gives it up on the first date?

Most guys don't judge on this one way or another, although if you have sex on the first date all of their friends will know. (i.e. the only question a guy's guy friend asks him after a date "did you f*ck her?" don’t be offended, but that’s pretty much the extent of the conversation amongst men regarding their dates). Sex on a first date opens you up to a guy just hooking up with you and not calling again; but you should know if it went really well or not and then go from there. Looking at it separately, a girl that makes out with someone on the first date in public; big time turn-off & long-term issues. French-kissing on the dance floor or anywhere - ain't gonna work. Most of this stuff should take place in private. If a chick is making out with you in public, she's making out with other people in public. Can't be marrying that.

4. Do you carry a condom at all times?

Never, anyone carrying a condom is a douche-bag. Run from these men. Also, girls shouldn’t have condoms at their house; it makes them look like a slut. (never tell someone "it's ok, I have condoms") - for me, big time turn-off (unless she has a boyfriend and this is a sexual fling...then it makes sense that she has condoms). If no condoms at your house suck it up and don't have sex. If the first or second date goes really well there's plenty of stuff to do without sex, and for sure he'll come better prepared next time.

5. If you have been on a date recently, any good advice for the girls that come next?

Drink & have fun. Let the guy pick up the tab for dinner & early drinks, but there's nothing better than once you treat a girl right having her say 'let's grab a nightcap on me'. Guys should pay for most, but a girl who is confident, successful, and generous are hard to find and a big time turn on.